Love? or Lust? or Companionship?
Human are so complex. Complex physical, complex emotions, complex thinking and of course, they get involved in complex relationship.

In my life, i've seen many married couple being torn apart by death. Initially, they were all very sad (being very emotionally complex), then, it would be followed by a period of trying to move on or self-denial. Most choose to move on. They would find a partner later on in life.

Is this right?

I'm not against people moving on with their lives after the other half passed away. In fact, i think it's healthy. They should not be deprive of a normal life, even without the other half.

What i'm talking here are those who had move on, too fast.

Those, while their another half is still living, stay as a normal couple (what goes on after the door is close we don't know), but once one pass on, the other find another partner in a very short time. Does this classified as unfaithful? Call me conservative, i think one should wait for 3 years. For that's the period where Chinese believe that the dead has move on to be recarnated.

I know of a family friend, whose wife got cancer. Due to the fact that it's at a later stage, the doctor consulted the husband on a series of treatment. The treatment might not work for the wife, but there's no harm for a try. The husband DENIED the wife a chance of recovery, saying that it's too painful for him to see her going through the pain from treatment. He can't bear it. The wife died 3 months later, when the cell spread to other area of her body.

Less than half year later, a relative saw him buying a King-size bed with a women. The bed was found in his house when the relative visited on the New Year, together with traces of female inhabitants (like cosmetics, and soiled FEMALE clothes in the laundry area).

I can imagine the spirit of the late wife watching in the room while the two of them fuck on the new King-size bed, sadako style.

Scary!!!

I don't know if it's retribution, but the guy fall sick shortly after the first death anniversary of the wife, and have been in bed ridden since, the same King-size bed.
9/30/2004 03:21:00 PM
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Life Story
Last night i had problem falling into sleep, so my thoughts roam... I thought about my life from as early as possible. And realised i could remember things as far back as when i'm 3 years old.

From being a only child, to adopting a pet monster called "baby brother", we share a love hate relationship with each other. He's a spoiler, spoilt games, spoilt toys, spoilt my books. Whatever things that passes his hands were being amputated. Cockroaches included. Gosh, he even tear them apart to eat them!But at the same time, there's an instinct in me that make me want to protect him. Maybe it's due to the skinny frame, or the cry-baby stunt he was pulled on when he couldn't get his way...

Then there was the endless shifting from one house to another. And mum seem to be always in hospital. I played with boys my age, play with guns and balls. Dolls haven't come into my life, yet.

Then i moved to Yishun, which, at that point of time, seems like another country.

I got to know new neighbours, some good, some bad. Learn alot of social skills as i entered Primary One. Ok ok, i lied. As a kid, i'm kinda anti-social. So much so that the teacher asked to see my mum. I have only one friend, which luckily, we are still in contact. Well, i seem to have snap out of it. I'm surrounded by many friends now. ^__^ I'm popular...

Secondary school life was a confusing time, and i was what people called "Ah Lian". Trying to find myself while having a tonne of family problem did not help. I was a rebellious kid by nature, and the rebellious streak in me double during this period. The 4 years also see many boys entering and leaving my life like a MRT station. Thank god i didn't fall into wrong hands. It was also here that i made my first personal major decision (i think so), i left my clique to survive alone, only to find myself involved in another clique so alien i could have believed they come from MARS. We were not sharing the same frequency, but they won my trust.

Then, poly life started and made more friends, found myself a man, and have sort of settled down. Make friends, lost friend, juggling jobs and school... Everything seem to be on a fast-forward motion.

Here i am, out in the workforce, and could feel my career picking up, with many of my friends loving me (you know who you are), and a man to support me. Now, looking back, it all seem so surreal. Like it's a movie, so detached. I wonder how i'm goin to complete my story when i am at my death-bed. Will i be as lucky?


9/29/2004 10:02:00 AM
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Decided!
Ah-ha! No vote, No indecisiveness!

Found this skin while cruising in Blogskins while at work (Boss's not in! ^__^)

It was love at first sight... Retro, yet stylish. I saw a lot of skin in blogskin.com that were so sad, some even named "suicide", broken angel", or "rag doll"

God, how to start the day right? When you're being negatively influence while u blog?

No, my blog SHALL bring happiness!! In fact, i should say,

"I demand my blog to brighten up someone's day out there"

Ok, so this skin will stay.

Compliments anyone? Keep the complain to yourself, especially u Mel!!

Oh, don't you just love the B&W TV set...
9/28/2004 05:50:00 PM
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Slapping myself
I ask for comments on the new blog skin, instead, all i got was complain..

So, i decide to list out ALL my choice. And let you, the reader, decide. Since you are going to face it more than i do anyway.

So, here goes in preference order...

1) Brand New Me

2) Black Angel

3) Forbidden Me

4) Deep Thoughts

5) Maroon Whisper

6) Kiss of Butterfly

So, voting time. Pls cast ur vote in the comment thingy...

Talking about democracy!
9/27/2004 09:07:00 PM
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Saturday Night Out--Newton Circle
Finally meet up with Fiona, Lynn and Mandy. We had dinner at Newton circle. As usual, we were surrounded by lala, stingrays, sambal kangkong, sugercane and endless gossip. All the dishes were spicy, but none as spicy as the conversation exchange.

The topic most of the time was--Dogs. Lynn wanted to get a dog. Make me think back to the time when i just got Yoyo. She's a dear little thing, capturing one's heart at the first meeting, with the fluffy fur and soulful eyes, it's hard not to give in to her. And she knows it.

Anyway, our clique of sisters emerged one teacher. Lynn is joining NIE (National Institute of Education). Gosh! I can imagine her being terrorize by a group of monsters in their habitat--Secondary Schools. At the age of 13-17, these monsters are at the middle of evolving into adults. Of course, the process are ugly. From being rebellious to itchy hands (vandalism) there's nothing they can do. I know, cause i have a pet monster at home, he's called BROTHER.

I myself had succesfully complete the process. But then again, even when i'm a monster, i'm just a tiny weeny one. So, lucky for the teachers teaching me... *smiles*

Back to topic, being a teacher is good, if you don't mind working in a monsters' den. The benefits is good, the pay is better. A training teacher take home pay is $1,500 to $1,600!!

We chatted till 11 at night. Even saw Wong Lilin & Allan Wu. Gosh, Lilin is pregnant!? She still has the PERFECT figure from the back!! Wearing a black Giodano racer back top, she show off a slendier waist than most of us non-preggo woman!! So jealous!!

Tiger Airlines. Or Kitty?
This time round, when my company is going Bangkok, we decided to use Tiger airline.

We booked through the Internet. The process is quite easy. Only till the last pair of ticket, the site met some problem, and prompt me to try again. I did, in the end, there was a duplication of tickets. I emailed for enquiries, they did not reply, so i send again. I waited for a week, yet no reply again.

I even went down to Tampines SITEL to see what they could help me with. Nothing.
They said they are two entity, if you book through the Interent, you have to go back to the Internet if you need any help.

Furious, i type in a formal complain letter. Click

Within 2 hours, they called me personally. And everything was settled. I don't get it. Why must they wait till the customer lose patient before they do any action?

When i persue, they claimed that they have not received my email. If you tell me one of the email gone missing, i can understand. But three?

Anyway, everything is finally cleared. Now, i'll just sit and wait for October. Yeah!!
9/27/2004 01:36:00 PM
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New Look
Elyna advice me to change my blog skin to a sexy one, and i promise to put my nude pics up.

I did.

But the result turn out to be more kinky than sexy.
In fact, after staring at it for 30sec, i'm trying very hard not to break into laughter...

It's quite far from sexy, it's more like infant porn...

So, the failure make me think what kind of feeling i'm going to give my viewer. Yes, although sex sell (no doubt), but i don't want people visiting my site thinking i'd feed them porn.

I want them to be happy looking at my blog. Although sometimes i make crude complain, i still want my reader to be happy, not that there's alot to speak about. But it still counts.

So... (hold your breath *drumroll*)

THIS is the result!!!

How? what do you think? I LOVE THE CUPCAKES!! Look so yummilicious...
Comments Pls!!
9/24/2004 03:50:00 PM
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Sex Buddy
Just found out that one of my acquiantance actually have a sex buddy.

Wipe that question mark off your face, it simply means that she have a friend who satisfied her sexual needs. They are not couple, just friends, everyday friend.

So whenever my friend has the "needs", she'll just call the "friend" and they will shag out.

Shockingly, my friend told me that they always do it in HIS house, coz he lived with his grandma, who's out gossiping at kopi-tiam most of the time.

"Anyway, hotel make one look cheap" she said. Irony.
Ok, so one can sleep around and don't look cheap, as long as you don't go to hotels. Then what about some married couple who have no privacy at home (living with in-laws) and have to go to hotel? Cheeaappp....

Or some couples who want more romantic, something different from everyday? Cheeaappp...

It makes no sense!

In my personal view, at least the man has to pay to have sex with a prostitute. For the sex buddy, it can be classified as "Free prostitution" Why give him such a good deal?

Yes, both of them are single at the moment, but what will happen when the time comes for one of them to be attach? And if this happen, can the other party let go? Or they still carry on behind the partner's back?

They didn't think of the consequense. Human are emotion beings. And alot of time, feelings grow for each other without our knowledge. And we only realised it when it's too late. If this happen, the unattached party could use the sex-buddy-relationship to blackmail/threaten the party to come back.

And don't say i didn't warn, woman especially falls into emotional trap easily.

Let's just hope they will snap out of lust soon and face the reality.
9/23/2004 09:21:00 AM
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Weekend Sleepaway
Hubby is having the M5 exam on Tuesday, but lucky me, he did not put me in cold storage. To save time, he simply left me in the office...

Work was cancelled at last minutes (Huuray!) and i manage to visit the gym. Mahjong session was cancelled as well (Boohoo~) and so, I've got time on my hand. I sent a former complain letter to hubby for time wastage.

He compensate by watching Anacondas with me. ^__^

I was waiting to watch this movie!! So much so that when i wanted to order Avocado milkshake at the fruit stall, i said "One anaconda milkshake pls, with more honey"
The auntie stared at me as if i'm one nutcase... Finally, it drawn on her that i want a "Avocado" milkshake, and ask me, "Avocado" is it? I don't sell python here leh..." At this point of time, i realise my folly.

Embarrassed, i said to auntie, "I testing u only lah... Now the movie so hot, u should rename the drink to attract more customer"

In respond to this, auntie gave me a (-_-")

Anacondas-Search for the Blood Orchid
The plot is quite good, but quite predictable. Like i know the stone-spider will play a crucial part in the movie the moment it first enter the show.. Like i know the snake become so big due to their consumption of the blood orchid.

And the best actor is none other than the clever monkey. It had kana chase by the snake, kana thrown down at the waterfall, kana trap in the hole, kana miss the boat, and still survived the WHOLE ordeal... With terrified expression to lovingly rubbing face with the survival..

Who can beat that?
9/20/2004 08:45:00 PM
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Recommendation of the week
Hey, check out this blog, A New York Escorts Confessions. Pretty interesting, and the blogskin suit the topic to a T!

Make me feel like changing my blogskin too. Had on this skin for too long, it seems like FOREVER and ever...

What should a choose? A cute theme, or a more womanly and spicy skin?

5th Lives in 2 months
See, it happened again!

And it's on Bishan station again!!

My mum said that station was cursed, coz it lies in the opening of the tunnel, which, in feng shui sense, was like the door to "underground". How much sense is this feng shui sense, i don't know. And never will know.

But it seems suspicious, looking at how many people choose to commit suicide (or faint, or fall down.. Whatever!) at that particular station. Why don't they choose Novena? Which is more famous about supernatural happening, that will make all the folktales seem more interesting... BECAUSE, Novena had doors to prevent people from jumping onto the track.

Maybe, Bishan station should have doors too.

But then again, if this happen, SMRT will find an excuse to increase the fare price again!


NOOOO!!!

Maybe SMRT should dedicate a station for all this business to be done... No no... It's like encouraging suicide. We are not Japanese...


Actually, running one big round, it's ALL the society fault.
Singapore is too stressful, work is stressful, family is stressful, LIFE is stressful.

I think, if you place a Singaporean on a relax place, where one do nothing but sip drinks and read books. I can assured you, the Singaporean will go bonkers. He/She won't know what to do!

So, what's the solution to this?
9/16/2004 10:10:00 AM
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Epilator virgin
My mum bought home a Braun epilator

We put the monster on my dressing table for 3 days, and there, like a monster it stood. Tall, proud, and intimidating.

Ok ok, that's what we felt.

We keep on pushing the monster to each other, saying that we had just done some form of hair remover, and now, there's simply no more hair to epilate. (-_-")

A picture of my lost friend keep appearing in my mind. It seems like a long time ago, she was trying to convince me to use an epilator instead of plucking them one by one. But it seems like yesterday, i said "no, thank you". I wonder how she's doing now...

I have a chance to create a better future for her, but would she take it? Was she still reading my blog? was she happy? I have no answer.

Back to the monster, so, last night, i finally convinced my mum to try it. Saying that it's HER idea to buy this thing.

She surrendered. ^__^

Well, the experience is.. not so bad! The sound of the machine is quite scary.
But there's not much feeling of pain, or whatsoever.

The result?
Smooth, hairless leg. Plus underarms.
A fashion must-have.

I'm a convert.
9/15/2004 09:42:00 AM
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To Tell? Or Not to Tell?
Today is the first time i went cold canvassing.

Arm with a booklet of survey, and a heavy heart, i set out on my first assignment. Actually, it was part of my recruitment job, but it was usually applicable to desperate recruitment officer.


LIKE ME *sob


Truly, i rather "hook up" people at McDonald, as long as they don't look like kid to me.

Which means, i can only do it on women, ALL men are kids. FOREVER.

Anyway, i plant myslf in the middle of the junction just beside the famous temple at Bencoolen Street, and tried not to look like a lamp post. I seriously suspect that i have some wires loose while having currents running wild. It's as if that any person who get within 1meter radius of me will get a electric shock.

This was how it goes:

1) Innocent passer-by 1 spotted me, and gasp...

And they will give me THE look:

2) Then, they tried to convince themselves that I'm REALLY the lamp post..

3) When they realise that i'm not the lamp post, and actually the surveyor, they start to hasten their pace, all the while staring at me through the side of their eyes to make sure that i'm not coming in their direction.

4a) If i'm walking in their direction, they will fall into a trance. Shaking their head, some mumble, some wave to me (in a UNFRIENDLY manner)

4b) When i happened to stand on their path, and they had to get pass me some how (i love this part), they will lower their head, and hope that i'm REALLY the lamp post(with ALL their finger crossing). At this time, i will usually put on a manacing smile, and pretend to approach them. It's enough to get them fly away like a peck of pigeons. Khroooo~

THEN, i'll secretly smile in self-satisfaction...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ok, so what's the hooha, u ask.

The thing is, i saw the husband of my mum's best friend with another WOMAN. Walking on the street arm in arm. The girl was young, pretty with curly hair. She didn't dress up, but still look pretty attractive. Darn, she's prettier than ME! And most important, she looked submissive.

THAT's what every guy falls for.

We met each other heads-on. When the uncle saw me, its too late, we are on each other's path. I pretended not to see him. He walk pass me with his head tilted 90 degree to the opposite side.

Common, do you think i'm stupid?

Then, they hide behind a tent, use for the 7th month. When they imerge, the girl was walking 5meter ahead of the uncle.

How obvious can it get?

What i saw sent me into a state of shock. I didn't know what to do. I'm personally quite close to this auntie, and her husband. They had 2 boys. Okay, so the auntie, aka the wife, is not the submissive type. More like the Chen Liping at the 9pm show, air on weekdays. But i still feel it's wrong for the husband to have mistress outside.

But all the people i consulted had advised me to pretend i didn't see anything.

Should I? But it will be against my conscious... At the same time, part of me wanted to forget about the whole thing. What the wife don't know won't hurt her. Beside, i don't one to be the one responsible for breaking the family for the 2 little boys.

What should I do? Tell? Not to tell?
9/13/2004 05:39:00 PM
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Something in Life


It's wierd that people emphasize so much on the birthday. On my birthday, i'm THE Queen, i can order Hubby to rub my legs, clean the dishes, bring me out for posh meals, i can even demand for expensive presents (but me, being the most peerrfect girlfriend, did not demand, just REQUEST ^__^) But once the clock struck twelve, i'm back to Cinderella again.

AND, i got to rub HIS legs, clean HIS dishes, no posh meal and no present!! *sob

Why can't people have birthday 365 days a year!? (o_O)

Right, on the topic of Garfield, Who had seen the movie? How was it?
I was torn between Anaconda and Garfield on this Saturday.

Which one should i watch?
9/10/2004 11:35:00 AM
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PMS
I'm feeling so down!! Is it the PMS? Or is that things recently have not been smooth? Life is truly NOT a bed of roses....

*sigh!!

I'm feeling so worn out. Tired? No, just felt life slipping away... and abit fat...

I felt like going for a holiday. Why, i even dream of Bintan beach last night!! The tan i "bake" there has faded. Is it a cue for me to go back? I wish!!

But one little comfort is that i'm fetching my little baby back today from Best Denki @ Ngee Ann City! Can't wait!! My OWN little notebook. La la la la~

9/08/2004 09:40:00 AM
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WICKER PARK
I went to watch Wicker Park on Saturday at Fort Canning Green. Yes, it's the "Movie in the Park" organize by Class 95, Got the ticket free when Class 95 came to my office bldg (Fuji Xerox) on the grand opening. =)

The sneak preview will be showing this coming weekend. And hey girls, throw your boyfriend aside, and see the movies with your thick-and-thin sisters... Coz men will NEVER appreciate this kind of movie.

First, it's a flash-back movie, so, the initial part is not only confusing, but boring as hell as well. But trust me, u only need a little patient to get to the juicy part. This movie will let u leave the theatre stamping ur feet and swearing for the heartache of the two lovers.

Second, i think guy will probably think that such love story dun exist in real life. So they will insist that it's all bullshit, and the movie is made to con naive girls like YOU.

So trust me, throw the men aside.

I rather throw the men, then skip this movie. Josh Hartnett was send from heaven (beside wesley), he look soooo dashing!! *dreamy look*
That puppy look never fails to capture my heart. Again, and again, and again...
I think i'm in loooove~


Ok, dun tell wesley that ok. I dun wanna have one of my ear yank off...
9/06/2004 10:15:00 AM
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